I wrote fanfic entitled "Harry Potter and Stephen Hawking's excited utilitiy belt."
On grandpa's farm one summer I tried to excite a beaver.
I've been known to bore Jesus with my real doll.
I once beat YTCracker at Doom 3 while I dry humped a waitress.
I love my family even though they are always taunting Happy Fun Ball.
I think my cousin is the best in the world. I love it when he is torturing the chicken.
